Unwrapped: The Gift of Brokenness {www.boldlytanya.com}

Unwrapped: The gift of Brokenness

Dec 4th, 2016

“I know what you are going to say, and I don’t want to hear it,” my husband said on the other end of the line. I had interrupted his golf game with unwelcome news.

“I don’t want it, either, but I don’t have a choice,” I said, hanging up.

Eight months later, the nurses shuffled me into a room and started hooking up the monitors. The machine charted my contractions like perfect mountain tops against a graphical horizon. They were predictable and strong. It was time to meet our baby girl.

We knew I would have a c-section. As the procedure began, my doctor provided a play by play. “Oh look! I see a pair of feet!” Then, “Have you ever seen a tush so cute!”

Then silence.

Weighty, breath stealing silence and the certainty of something gone wrong.

Scar colored lenses.

Nov 23rd, 2015

When I project my concerns on her, I am forsaking God’s promises in favor of worry and fear. Perhaps there will come a time when the scars of her facial deformity will make her want to hide. But maybe they won’t. Regardless, God will be there each step of the way, equipping us to handle it.

The Question

Dec 18th, 2013

“Mom, what is wrong with my lip?” I waited three years, ten months, and twenty-five days for her to ask. Not a day had passed that I didn’t prepare my answer. I pondered and planned and deliberated constantly. I wanted to handle this with eloquence, poise and grace. I wanted to lovingly take my baby into my arms and tell her how wondrously and beautifully…

Letting Go of a Lifeline {www.boldlytanya.com}

Letting Go of a Lifeline

Oct 25th, 2013

When we began this journey, I had no idea special education programs even existed for infants and toddlers. Natalie was referred for early intervention services by her craniofacial team.  She was one week old.  We were exhausted and anxious as we sat in the waiting room filling out forms.  They asked me what school district we were in and then asked my permission to share…

Goodbye, Early Intervention. Hello, Special Education.

Mar 8th, 2013

This week, we transitioned from early intervention to special education.  I have a lot of to say about this process.  I want to detail how the process has affected my family and me personally. Today; however, I am going to stick to the facts, and try to explain some of the major differences.  I could be way off.  I know it varies from state to…

My Favorite Ways To Love a Services Coordinator {www.boldlytanya.com}

My Favorite Ways to Love A Service Coordinator

Mar 7th, 2013

If your child is between the ages of birth and three and has qualified for early intervention services, chances are excellent that you have a Service Coordinator. I believe these people are the unsung heroes of early intervention.  Not just because they tie everything up in a beautiful bow for your convenience, but also (and most importantly) because they give you the tools you need,…

Grieving Perfection

Feb 26th, 2013

I spent nine months contemplating what my baby would look like when I finally got to meet her. I studied her skeletal ultrasound pictures for hours. I recognized so many of her features from her brother and sister, so in my head, I put those pieces together into a mosaic of the perfect baby. I saw her bright blue eyes.  I saw her brilliant smile.  I…